Infinite Me
Lately, I’ve been thinking about scale.
As a human being, I’m one of eight million species on this planet, each with its own unique set of perceptions and ways of expressing, exploring and experiencing this world we share. That’s not even considering that our planet is one 400 billion planets in our galaxy alone in a universe that’s wide beyond measure
Zoomed out, the trappings of our personality: income, physical appearance, accomplishments, are simply not visible. Yet we take great stock in these differences, not because these qualities are innately valuable, but because we are identified with them. We wantto find some place to hang the hat that is ‘me’. Creating an identity is a process that happens over time. We’re taught to define and label ourselves, and to make sense of who we are through those labels. We might even rank ourselves within these categories to see how we’re measuring up. There’s nothing wrong with that, but it isn’t the whole picture of who we are and what our potential might be.
A more nuanced way of thinking about identity is as a color. Light has the potential to break into every color of the rainbow. Each color is a different expression of light as it is absorbed and reflected back to the eye.
One morning you might wake up a soft yellow. You, as a being are actively expressing yellow, by reflecting it back wherever you go. Are you yellow? No, because tomorrow you may be turquoise or purple or blue. You are the one who is choosing to be yellow. That might harmonize with other people’s choices- you meet a blue and collaborate, making a vibrant green. But you might struggle to understand purple- who’s on the opposite side of the color wheel. Try this simple experiment to learn more about where you and others are at
Color Experiment
Close your eyes, take a few deep breaths and allow your body to relax.
Ask your imagination to show you what color you are right now . See it in your mind’s eye.
Take a moment to notice and appreciate that color- just enjoy it for a moment or two, then you can let that color go.
Ask your imagination to show you the color of someone you’d like to understand better. See their color in your mind’s eye.
Take a moment to appreciate their color, even if it isn’t one you naturally gravitate towards. Notice the quality of their color- the shade, opaqueness, vibrancy.
Notice if any part of you wants to have an opinion. Have some amusement if it happens. It’s just a color after all. Then, when you’re ready, let that color go too.
This simple exercise is a way to understand yourself and others better. But it doesn’t work in the logical, analytical way. It works on the level of seeing or knowing, without having to make sense of anything, reduce or explain. If you return to this exercise and repeat it, you’ll also notice the colors shift and change.
We change. We’re always changing. Today we might be yellow, but that doesn’t define us. It’s like a song we’re singing. We were young now we are old. We are happy, now we’re sad. We have within us the potential for all of these different ways of being. All of these differences are a vast and wonderous gallery of costumes. We put them on and we can take them off again. We choose them, but they do not define us. They are ways of experiencing life on a tiny planet in a vast sea of stars. One planet, among multitudes, unique and ever changing. What would happen if we could see ourselves and others this way? Not as small, Not as lacking. As one of eight billion wonders of the universe. As expressions of infinite possibility.
